


Love

by anderperrysupremacist



Series: Anderperry April [11]
Category: Dead Poets Society
Genre: M/M, i miss them, this is also super late i'm sorry i've just been going through something
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-22
Updated: 2019-04-22
Packaged: 2020-03-07 04:55:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18866143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anderperrysupremacist/pseuds/anderperrysupremacist
Summary: Neil takes Todd out dinner, and Todd ends up confessing his feelings for Neil.





	Love

**Author's Note:**

> Anderperry April: — Day 22: "I love you"
> 
> i totally forgot to post this on the right day so i backdated again. i've been such a mess recently and i'm sorry. my best friend and i had a fight and i'm so upset i'm basically falling apart at the seams because i'm really hurting. i'm sorry for being so scatterbrained recently and i hope you forgive me. enjoy:)

Neil and Todd were out on a date. They had never been on a real date before, except with Meeks and Pitts, and Neil wanted them to have a romantic evening together with just the two of them. They were at Olive Garden; Neil let Todd decide where they went to dinner, since he was so quiet about the things he wanted most of the time. When it came time for them to order, Neil ordered for the both of them, as he always did; Todd had tried to order for himself several times before in attempt to prove people didn't need to order for him, but it never worked. He would get too nervous and be unable to form a coherent sentence.  
Neil and Todd both ordered the same thing, lasagna. While they were were waiting for their food, they started talking.   
"Thanks for taking me out, Neil."  
"No need to thank me," Neil said, smiling, "we've been due to go on a real date for a while."  
"Yeah."  
They became quiet again for a few minutes, watching waiters hustle by with food that wasn't theirs and people being seated. Once in a while, one of them would catch the other glance over at them, and they'd both blush and smile at each other before looking back at passersby.   
"Are you feeling okay?" Neil asked. He knew Todd sometimes got nervous in crowded places; he wanted to make sure he was feeling okay. Sometimes, if he got too overwhelmed, he would become physically ill.  
Todd nodded, taking a drink of water. He was already on his second glass. He tended to drink a lot of water to cool him down when he got anxious; he wasn't, but he wanted to take precautions just to be safe.  
"That's good," Neil said.  
"Yeah. If you weren't here, it might be a different story. I feel safer when I'm with you."  
Neil blushed. He was trying to hide the fact that he was smiling, but the crinkles under his eyes gave it away.  
"Really?"  
"Yeah," Todd replied, nodding.  
"That makes me happy."  
"Me too."  
Neil and Todd continued talking up until their food arrived, and as they started eating. They hadn't gotten to talk this much with just the two of them in the conversation in a while, and they were taking advantage of it.   
"So," Neil said, taking a bite of food, "what do you want to do after this?"  
"Uh, I don't know."  
"We can think of something together."  
"Sure," Todd replied. He was moving pieces of lasagna around on his plate. Neil frowned. He'd forgotten Todd got nervous eating in front of people, especially when he was somewhere crowded—and the restaurant was definitely packed full of people. He saw Neil watching him and frowned back at him.  
"I'm sorry," Todd said quietly as he looked back down at his plate.  
"It's okay, Todd," Neil said softly, "you don't need to apologize."  
Todd nodded, but Neil could tell he didn't believe him. His eyes seemed sad. Neil hurriedly glanced around the restaurant, making sure people weren't watching them, then reached his hand out to touch Todd's. He rubbed his thumb across Todd's fingers, and he was smiling a little.   
"It's okay," Neil said again. He pulled his hand back in the hopes nobody had seen him touch Todd's hand.

~

Neil and Todd were walking around the town after dinner, talking. Neil was trying to make small talk, and Todd was quiet.  
Neil tried not to think to much of it. Maybe he was still overwhelmed from dinner? Or was he just tired? He noticed Todd kept looking over at him every few seconds, then quickly looking away.  
Neil felt Todd take hold of his hand, and they kept walking.  
"So–"  
"Neil?"  
"Yeah, Todd?"  
"I, um..."  
Neil stopped and turned around. Todd was crying.  
"Hey, hey, what's wrong?" Neil said gently as he rushed up to Todd. He took hold of his other hand and squeezed it tight.  
"I don't-I don't know," Todd cried. His face and eyes were red. He looked down at the ground; he didn't want to look Neil in the eye when he was crying.  
"Did something happen?"  
"No," Todd cried, "I just--I have something I've been wanting to tell you, but-"  
"What is it?"  
Todd was looking down at the ground, still crying. His shoulders were shaking.   
"Hey, shh," Neil said, guiding Todd's chin up to face him. He wiped Todd's tears away, like he always did.   
"Neil, I-I'm in love with you."  
Neil stopped for a minute and just stared at Todd.  
"Wait, what?"  
Todd bit his tongue to try stop himself from crying, but it wasn't working. He tried to stifle a sob.  
"I'm in love with you," he cried. He was so embarrassed that he covered his face with his hands for a few minutes. He didn't want Neil to see him like this. He needed to calm down.  
Neil froze.  
"God," Todd cried as he wiped his eyes and nose, "I've never felt this way about anyone before. You're the first person and the first boy I've fallen in love with, which is really, really hard for me to be okay with. I've been in denial for so long because of my parents that when I started having feelings for you, I hid them. I thought maybe they would go away. I can't hide this anymore. If you don't feel the same way, that's fine, but I can't keep hiding how I feel about you anymore."  
Neil's eyes grew wide. The way he was looking at Todd then was the way everyone wants to be looked at. He cupped Todd's face in his hands. Todd was still crying pretty hard. He put a hand on top of Neil's and let out a little watery giggle, tears still running down his cheeks.  
"I love you, Todd."  
Todd giggled again.  
"Kiss me," he said.  
Neil leaned in and kissed Todd. He felt Todd smile as he kissed him back. After, Neil wrapped Todd in a hug.  
"I love you, you big softie," Neil teased.  
"I love you, too."  
Neil grabbed Todd's hand again.  
"Let's go home, yeah?"  
"Yeah."


End file.
